Posted by: brambledoula | August 29, 2007

Searching for something…?

I love to see what search entries get you to my site. A little voyeuristic curiosity on my part. Most of them are pretty normal, like pregnancy, circumcision, diaper free, etc. Some are a little odd like “italian sausage pregnant woman”.

Two recent ones that caught my eye are :

“Am I ready to be a mom”

and

“Why do I hiccup when I’m pregnant”

I think those are actually good valid searches that probably weren’t answered on this site.

The hiccup question is a little easier to answer. Mostly as the baby puts more and more upward pressure on your organs and diaphragm, it’s expected for things to get a little out of whack.  A lot of women yawn more as well due to the lessened lung room. Various gastrointestinal pyrotechnics are just all part of the bag and for the most part normal.

As for being ready to be a mom…that’s a little trickier. I think we’re simultaneously always and never ready to be a mom. So much of it is just innate and built in. Once your baby gets there and is in your arms you will love it unconditionally and that alone makes you ready. Thousands of women before you have carried and birthed and raised their children and you are descended with their inherent knowledge. If you remember to look within when doubtful of all the good hearted but often bad advice around you (and if it hasn’t already, it will come), you will find the answers that fit you best. 

On the other hand, these little buggers don’t exactly come out with instruction manuals and there is a HUGE learning curve that comes with parenthood.

For starters, there is something called firstborn guilt, that I’ve discussed with other mothers many times over. Just be prepared that you will likely do something “wrong” with your first, on many occasions, and be prepared that despite those bumps in the road they’ll probably turn out fine. Most of us think we studied enough baby books to know it all until babe gets here and it’s fly by the seat of your pants. Then you learn something new. And something else new. And you keep learning, and applying, and keeping what works and throwing out what doesn’t. I swear sometimes I kept having kids because I learned something new that was too late to try with the last one so I needed to have one more to try on the next one!

Also keep in mind that there is really no “right” time to have a baby. So many people wait for the right time, missing opportunities and sometimes wind up too late. While certainly there are some very very wrong times, for the most part there is never enough money, or space or any of the other things people worry about with children. You will make do whatever you are handed.

Do the best you can and you’ll likely do fine.

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